Monday, January 31, 2011

Hot Dog Theory

The hot dog theory was introduced to me last night by Shawn and I LOVE it!  Her BFF, Tonya came up with the hot dog theory and how it pertains to natural selection and I, literally, laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants!  I'm going to re tell it the best I can and since Tonya doesn't read my blog, I can get away with embellishing! Ha!  (this is why EVERYONE should read my blog! ha!)

The stupidity of America all began when someone's mamma decided their child wasn't smart enough to chew up a hot dog.  Momma cut the hot dog up for baby dumb dumb and got in the way of natural selection.  If a person isn't smart enough to know to chew, maybe nature should take it's course!

That sounds catty and mean, and of course I don't think babies should be subjected to choking to death on hot dogs but it does make you think!

I have been following this story about Dennis Kucinich, who is a congressman from OH.  Basically, he is suing a restaurant because he was too stupid to eat their food.  This guy sounds like a complete tool anyway but seriously, how do these morons get elected?  Oh yeah, by those people who can't chew hot dogs!  I know, someone (Greg possibly) will inevitably bring up the old story of GW versus the killer pretzel, but he didn't sue the pretzel maker!  And, that's all the defense I'll offer for that!

Then, you have this woman who can't walk through the mall without taking a dip in the fountain.  She was texting and walking and the two just don't work together!  I wouldn't normally judge that, because lets be honest, it wouldn't be that surprising if it happened to me, but she took it too far!  She hired an attorney!  She said security should have done more!  LIKE WHAT?  Shoot her so she didn't fall in the fountain?  Perfect example of a time when the hot dog would have won!


  1. And, I'm speechless...after the laughter ofcourse. ;) About the woman in the fountain...did you see how fast it happened? I constructed a text in less time it took her to fall in and get out of fountain. IDIOT!

  2. I am so sending this to Tonya!!! My dad and I laughed our butts off!!

  3. This is priceless! Love the woman in the fountain and the sheer stupidity of the lawsuit. Did you hear that her lawsuit was deemed invalid due the number of hot checks she had out and now the tables are turned? OH MY GOODNESS, maybe a hotdog would have saved her a whole lot of humility. Perhaps she'll put down the knife next time she has one, she probably still can't figure out how to chew ;)