Thursday, June 30, 2011

Frenemies to Friends?

I went out with an old "frenemy" not long ago and had a great time.  This was a girl who ran in a similar circle as I did and we shared common hobbies, interests, and friends but for whatever reason we were never actually friends.  As far as I know, she never really had any problems with me (although when she reads this, she may! ha!) but I never sincerely liked her.  I would be nice to her but secretly I resented her. 

A couple of years ago we friended on face book (yes to the teen next door-we old folks have face book!) and the more I followed her facebook, the more I realized we had a lot in common and I actually really liked her, I was seeing her through entirely different eyes than I did at 16.  I actually listened to her, talked to her, appreciated where she's been in life (for the past 10+ years).  She's a fun loving, good christian, intelligent, woman.  Really, she's the type of friend I enjoy being around and maybe she always was, but as a teen I couldn't see past my opinion of her.

The sixteen or seventeen year old I saw was beautiful, smart, popular, fun, and the boys loved her.  She had a great family, a hot boyfriend, and her life was perfect (right?!) So, naturally, I hated her (internally, of course).  It's really a shame that I missed out on being friends with a girl who was probably really nice, because I was jealous.  I honestly don't remember anything bad about her, I don't remember her saying anything mean about anybody, she was labeled a "good girl," and she probably was very likable.  (I wouldn't know because I never gave her a chance)  I wasn't unpopular, unattractive, or unlikable so there was really no reason for my internal competition with this girl but it existed anyway. 

I've thought this over quite a bit, for several reasons, and one is so I can help my daughters not make the same mistakes or at least advise them when they do. 

I think it all boils down to boys...

We road on 4H drill team together and she joined the team a year after I did.  I was comfortable with my group of friends and I was best friends with one of the boys on the team.  I don't know why, but I think it was sarcasm that drew Matt and I together from the very beginning.  We were both smart asses and thought we were tough so we really hit it off.  He was one of my very best friends for years and sometimes I still miss the closeness we once had.

Then came Danielle...Matt was smitten!  (most of the boys were if I remember correctly)  but I didn't care  about the other boys, I cared that she was taking my BFF's attention away from me!  I never had a "crush" on Matt, and we never dated, and there was no romantic competition, but she was interfering with my good times!  I think Matt and Danielle dated for about five minutes so it should have been a non issue but in my teen drama years, it was a big deal!  Add an ounce of insecurity,  a boy, and a pretty girl to compete with and you have one hot mess on your teenage hands!

The last time I was in Nashville, Danielle and I got together and had a good time. (Well, I did anyway, maybe she was hating life! ha!)  I got to know her as an adult, without pettiness, Matt, or any of the preconceived notions I'd had, and guess what...I liked her. She was still beautiful, smart, popular, fun, and the boys probably still love her, but I'm finally secure in myself (even if I didn't realize it was insecurity as a teen-it was) and I no longer see her as a threat or a competitor, I saw her as a woman who came from similar beginnings as I did.  I don't have a whole lot of friends from my childhood or teen years so it's really nice to spend time with someone who can relate to where I come from.  She's someone who has a common thread and I could see being friends with.  I forsee us getting together when I'm in Nashville and keeping in touch, and honestly, if we were to ever end up in the same city I think we'd be really good friends.

And if Danielle reads this (and she really should since I'm going to send her the link) next time I'm in town, the cold beer is on me!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

I'm Southern, Not Stupid

I recently spent a week getting back to my roots, God's country, you know...the south!  I love being southern, there is a certain pride and comradery amongst southerners that I love and appreciate.  It's a sense that, if you're not southern, you probably don't understand and that's okay; we planned it that way!  Ha!

I grew up in a small town in Kentucky and moved to Louisiana shortly after my 19th birthday.  I loved them both!  I had a great childhood in rural Kentucky and I learned southern pride from the best when living in Louisiana!  Maybe northerners have a sense of pride too and they just aren't as loud about it,  Obviously not everything southern is awesome but the modern day south is pretty rockin!
I fit a lot of the southern cliches.  I like to cook and I'm decent at it.  I love country music.  I like 4 wheelers and 4 wheel drives.  I LOVE them in mud!  I have a definite accent that thickens the longer I'm home.  I say ma'am and sir to anyone older than me and at drive thrus or on the phone (you can never be sure!).  I make casseroles and cookies for friends when there are hard times or they are sick.  I have big hair (that gets bigger in humidity!). 

On a side note, I'm convinced that big hair in the south was born of necessity.  Y'all northerners don't understand what humidity can do to your hair.  If you have natural curls, forget about it!  Embrace your big hair and call it style!

I grew up listening to country music, riding around on dirt roads, working on the farm, fishing, and frog gigging.  I was an active, award winning, member of FFA and 4H.  I could drive a tractor before I was in middle school.  I went to bonfire parties on saturday nights and church potlucks on sunday mornings.  I am a country girl, I may live in the suburbs now, but rest assured the roots are deep!

I'm not racist, married to a family member, or stupid.  I talk slow, I don't hear slow!  I do sometimes go barefoot in the summer but I wash my feet and put on my shoes when it's appropriate!  I cling to my guns and religion and I'm proud to be a Christian, American, and Southerner (in that order!)

I don't make fun of people for being from the north, there's just nothing funny about that, but I don't mind being razzed about being a southerner.  

One of my favorite southern humor stories to tell is when a woman and I were talking and she asked me to repeat myself a couple of times.  I thought she couldn't hear me so I sort of did a charade/mime movement and she figured it out.  Her reply "oh, you're southern That's why I didn't understand you!"  There was nothing malicious in her comment, we just had a cultural miscommunication.

Another time, I called my mechanic and he and I were talking about my car problems when he said "oh, you're southern...I'll have to talk slower."  I responded "nope, I hear fine.  You just have to listen a little slower!"  He's still my mechanic and he's awesome!

So, see, I can take a joke and I enjoy laughing and kidding around.  I miss the south, so much, but Indy is a good place the people are nice.  So, for all you northerners who think it's funny to make fun of us southerner's I say this...

"Y'all are just mad because you've spent most of your lives cold.  Go down south, warm up, and you'll be happier!"

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Christian Rock is Not My Jam

I'm not going to say that christian rock is sinful or offensive or any other judgemental stuff about it but it's definitely not for me.  I think that any way you get people to focus on God is a good thing and obviously different people need different avenues.  Listening to christian rock probably won't save your soul but it could definitely put you on the right path.

Last night I went to a concert of a very popular christian band, like internationally popular, and after about thirty minutes in I was ready to go.  I stood for nearly the entire three hour concert listening to music that wasn't terrible but it's just not my thing.  I saw people swaying to music, praising God, wistfully singing along, and praying but all I could think was, why does the music have to be so loud?  and, why can't we just sit down and listen?  does it really sound better standing?

Honestly, I have to admit to being moved a time or two by the reaction of the crowd.  It's quite touching to see that many people united to praise God, several religious backgrounds and cultures joining together for a common love of God.  That is some amazing stuff to think about and even more amazing to see!

Unfortunately, when you go see a christian rock concert, there are tons of teeny boppers around!  I'm too old and crabby to have any interest in standing for a three hour concert or jumping up and down in rhythm to every other song. I admire these young kids who so eagerly lay it out there!  I wish I'd had their charisma for Christ at such an early age and I pray my kids are so free with their love of God when they're teenagers.

I've gotten a little spoiled to smaller venues and more intimate shows, it's been a long time since I've gone to an arena rock concert and an even longer time since I've had floor seats!  We can probably agree this will be the last time I get floor seats.  At one point I sent a text to Danielle that said "know what seats I hate worse than nose bleed....floor seats...guess where I'm sitting!"  One of my pet peeves are when the band constantly asks the audience to sing.  They did this a lot.  If I want to hear myself sing I can do that in my car, I paid to hear the band!

I was glad I stayed because the lead singer (I suppose) made several comments and testimonies  that were very moving, they also had a couple more songs that I fell in love with!  One of the songs, literally, rocked me to the core.  The band was Hillsong United and the song was Aftermath.  Regardless of what I think of christian rock, this song was great!

All in all, it may not be my style but I respect the musicians and their talent.  They were very talented, beautiful voices, and awesome musicians.  Their lyrics were moving and amazing.  It was entirely too loud for me, and the standing for three hours was ridiculous, but I'm all for people worshipping God.  Christian rock is not my speed, but I'm sure it's someone's.  Who knows the way God may have worked in that arena last night and that's what matters.  It doesn't matter that the music didn't woo me, the crowd did.  It doesn't matter that the songs weren't my style, the lyrics were.  Realistically, it doesn't even matter that I was there.  God moved changed lives last night, maybe even mine and time will tell, but what matters is that we were there because it was God's plan.

This is the song that I was psyched to hear, but they didn't sing it last night.  From what I can tell (my opinion only) is that they started off a little more poppy and now they're gearing towards more rock.  So, last night was a rock concert and I guess I like Christian pop...who knew!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Happy Birthday Lydia Rae!

I thank God multiple times daily for my beautiful daughters.  They are so amazing and I am so grateful for every single moment I'm blessed enough to spend with them.  I appreciate the good days, the bad days, and the days I don't know if I should laugh or cry.  I try not to take a single moment for granted and I want to live each blessed moment to it's full potential.  Even the days when I want to pull my hair out, when I'm reflecting at the end, I know how blessed I am.

On June 7th, 2007 I woke up and quickly realized it was going to be a day that would change our lives forever, I was in labor!  I began getting dressed and trying to clean up and pack the last minute things in my bag.  I called Keith and told him to meet me at the hospital.  I told Emily, our nanny at the time, that I was going to go to the hospital because the baby was coming!  I told her I'd need her to sleep over with Hadley and I was going to meet Keith at the hospital.

Emily was barely 21 and one of the sweetest girls you'll ever meet and she confronted me in the bathroom, as I was trying to put on make up and pack toiletries.  Ever so timidly, she says "Lisa, I don't think I'm going to be able to let you drive yourself to the hospital."  I kind of brushed her off and told her I'd be fine when she said "I think I'm going to have to put my foot down.  You can't drive yourself to the hospital, you're in labor!"  Right about then, a contraction nearly took me down and I gave in!  I called Keith and told him we were going to have a change of plans and he needed to pick me up.

We got to the hospital and the maternity ward was busting at the seams! Literally, there were pregnant women all over the place!  The triage nurse tells me there is one labor and delivery room left and it would be determined by who progressed further, faster.  Yes, even labor and delivery is a competition!  I was sweating it, because the triage rooms are TINY!  The pregnancy had already been tricky so I, literally, prayed that God let me have the room!

The labor was progressing slower than it did with Hadley but I did manage to get the labor and delivery room, somehow!  (Thank you God!)  The midwife showed up and "checked" me and gave me some tips for speeding things up a little.  She suggested I walk around the labor ward or take a shower.  I went for a walk around the hospital-bigger than I thought and less pretty than I anticipated.  I got back to the room and decided to try out the shower suggestion.  I remember, at one point, sitting in the shower and yelling at Keith saying "WHO SUGGESTS THIS?  I'm wet and slick and in crazy pain!  What a stupid idea!"  I survived the shower (barely) I got dressed, and went back to the bed (like a sane pregnant woman!). 

I had an adorable L&D nurse, a midwife I loved, and an amazing doula, things really went pretty much as expected.  At one point the midwife asked if I wanted her to break my water to speed things up a little.  Ummm...YES!  Let's get this show on the road!  With Hadley, my water broke before I realized it (I'll tell that story on her birthday!) so I was surprised that things were going so slow.

Another time I remember when the nurses were chatting, waiting for Lydia to make her entrance.  For some reason it really irritated me that they were chatting so much.  I'm working my rear off and they were enjoying happy hour in my room.  My amazing doula (I really loved her!) asked them to wait outside until we were ready. 

I'm not going to share graphic details of the birth, for lots of reasons, but when Lydia made her grand entrance she was perfect!  They cleaned her up, handed her over and our love affair grew even faster.  I loved her from the moment we decided to have another baby.  Every single day, I grew to love her more and more but seeing her was magical.

Jeremiah 1:5 says "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."

What an outstanding blessing that God created this little princess he knew I would be her mommy.  God knew our lives intertwined and He blessed us with each other for a purpose.  I am so thankful that God chose me to be her mommy and her to be my Lydia.

Lydia entered the world and has changed our lives, for the better, every day she's been with us.  She has grown into such an interesting little girl with such a great sense of humor.  She is my little jokester, she's my sassy girl, and she's a light in our lives.  I can not wait to see the woman she will, one day become, but I'm in NO HURRY! 

I don't want to stop time, but I'd sure like a slow motion button!  Don't be in too big of a hurry to grow up little princess!  I LOVE YOU and I THANK GOD FOR YOU!

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Summer Vaca: Week 1 Review

Monday was Memorial day our whole family went to the pool!  Yay summer!

Tuesday:   Took Lydia to the doctor to get an all clear for her health!  Yay!  Pneumonia is gone!  I took the girls home and Karisa came and babysat so I could go birthday shopping for Lydia and get a pedicure.  I got some awesome gifts and my toes look pretty!

Wednesday:  Weekly breakfast at Einstein Brother's with Hadley & Lydia, trip to the library for  travel books on Indiana, off to an Indianapolis Indians game downtown.  LOVE baseball!  We went to Target to get Hadley a note book to journal her summer activities.

Thursday:  Planted flowers and cleaned up the yard with the girls.  They made an awesome planter together and played in the sandbox, last spring gymnastics class.

Friday:  Cleaned house, shopped at Claire's for new earrings for Hadley then Keith and Hadley played golf.

Saturday:  Babysitter while Keith and I went to Vintage Indiana, RECORD HEAT, pool time with the Wimmer's then pizza at our house while a storm raged outside.

Sunday:  Church, dinner after church, Kung Fu Panda @ ACM  Theater then an early bedtime so we can do it all over again this week!

All in all, this week has been an amazing one and I hope summer continues to be this great!  I'd say I've worn them out though!  Aren't they sweet!